Duo Birthday

I slept the whole day again. I lazy to meet my mum and I realise my sister dont know how to go Parkway Parade that is at Marine Parade. We took bus 45 and change to bus service 135. The bus service of 45 is so fucking long. Reached and went to eat. We are celebrated the past and future that is advance birthday for my sister and my mum. Is been long time I have not seen Roberta and Bryan. I wanna take picture but damn I lazy to take photo. I am so hungry. Lot of dish came. Let me try to recalled:

2 plate of stingray
2 plate of fried chicken wing
2 plate of seafood fried rice
1 plate of steam crab
2 plate of fried vegie
1 plate of mee goreng
1 plate of fried fish
1 bowl of white rice
12 cans of drinks

Total Cost: $190

Hahaha... Happy Birthday both of you guy and now just let me eat. Is a feast ya... But look out for bigger feast for my 21st birthday. I hope everything is well plan and hope all my friends could make it for birthday. Begin there for my birthday is a greatest gift you can give me.

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No Difference…

Finaz called me saying, “Jason you coming? I wanna see you” with her sweet voice and I have changed my mind and decide to visit them to see their first break fasting of their Ramadan. Also they wanna go bazaar at Geylang today. Get change and left the house and on the way to Woodland. I realize I am short of money. Damm… Anyway reach there Ranvin told me, “Ah!!! Finaz called and say come you come ah while I called you busted me ah… “I gave the innocent smile and laugh. When to visit Ranvin family while the Finaz and Shasha family do their prayer and break fast. Prema is so addicted to Bejewel. One of the Face book game. She played like hell and we chat while Aunty Rita and Kevin on the way to some birthday event. Ranvin showed me a hindi movie while the story is interesting. Two guy to pretend to be gay in order to rent the apartment. So as they lied, they try to hide the truth what ever they can. Hmmm… I did not see fully because I went back to the neighbor house that is Finaz and Shasha.

Went and they cooked lot of interesting stuff which they cooked. Some puff with stuff potato smash, noodle and the list goes on. I told them I am full but they cooked sure lot of food for the first day. Plus the extended family came to where cousin and relative as if it is Hari Raya festival. I like talking to the Mum while sometime the Dad tease me. Ha-ha… But they are nice people. If seem they delay the timing to the Bazar. They wanna go late so that they can get cheap discount and fewer crowds. So 2300 than 2345 I called the mum ended cancel. Cause everybody is tired. All feel sleepy, include me. When to sleep over at Ranvin house. Woke up 0530 and off I went to go back home. I just like the environment early in the morning. The first few first train and bus. I thought today is Sunday so there would be afew people but nah lot of Singaporean and PR go to work individual. No difference from week day. It seem Singapore just don’t wanna take break ah even on weekend.

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Rally And Ramadan

It seems that this month and the previous month, everything seems grand and festive mood. I did not expect this year round; the National Day is quite grand and just in the mood to celebrate. Also feeling proud and glad on what our grandfather build for this country. I just love this year National Day Rally by Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong's. Is much more refreshing than last year. Especially about race and religion on space between them and by not conflict or make thing complicated. I think it is challenging that country like our, that has so many race and religion to maintain the peacefulness and harmony. But to me I think it is common sense. I just don’t know why some people like to make thing complicating while thing are much simpler and easier. Communicate also don’t know how to communicate. Because sometime you did not pass the proper massage to another party as a result miscommunication and thing can get really messy. I do mix all type of races. I got a group of Indian community, a Malay community, a Chinese community and not only race but all type of religion and oversea country. At the end of the day we are all human. I am so glad I meet lot of interesting people. But some are insane. Hahah… But I like the future of Singapore that he talked about too. Where he showed that 50 years back during our grandfather time, they did not expect what Singapore becoming is by now. But same as us we can’t imagine what the success would be in 50 years in the future. I just love that part.

Not long Ramadan is coming soon. Also it seem much more grand that the previous year in what I seen. Ha-ha lot of people facebooking each other that fasting coming soon. Some greet happily and some seem put a sour face. Ha-ha… But I think it is interesting I am sure my Muslim friend will learn and gain something personal. Fast is all for your own good. I do fast in certain time and indeed I learn something. I remember I fast 3 days and 2 nights where water I only drank. No food. You will learn something. But I wanna see what the first day of break fast would be like. So I am glad Mr Ranvin and the Neighbor of Shasha families invite me to Geylang Serai tonight. I am sure is crowded and I wanna see the cultural tonight. So Happy Ramadan to all my Muslim friends. I WANT Ramli Burger... Haha...

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Now It Is 0403

This is the most ever insane time that I just post this in my blog. Now it is 0403. Yes, early in the morning. Cause I slept and woke up 1700 today. The rain is so heavy and is so cold and is nice to be under the warm blanket while you sleep like no body business. Ha-ha But sure I heard the wind grew strong and to me is sound like a sleepy melody. The day before that fall on my Dad pay day. We got a feast but Kumar gave me a surprise as I and my Dad talking while we were seeing this Thai movie called burn. Kumar just show his face with his innocent smile. I was surprise and invite him in. He talk about his work happen today. My family knows him well.

I invite him down for a coffee and we chat a lot. Not long back to my house and played some game. We sang karaoke, Singstar and he seem addicted to Puzzel Fighter. He love seeing me played Little Big Planet too. Not long I send him back home and I watch afew movie and knock out. Today, Friday went to Johor with Hariz and bought some movie. Met his Dover ITE friend and one of his friend got lost along the way. Ha-ha... I quit ITE Dover. Such a boring school. My GPA is high enough to go into the poly I wanna go next.

Talking about Poly I am kind of worried now. I don’t know why but recently I worried lot of stuff. I am worried in the future. I am getting the negative thinking again. Where I used to be a positive guy where I know I must not worried because God have planned for me. I am not daydreaming but is just that I know when is the right time to do it. Yes when Jason that what people gonna question me. I just no mood to find job now. Gowri called me saying they do have interview now in Integrated Resort in Casino Management. I am thinking should I go or not. If I do go that is my career and no more poly idea. I am just thinking lei…

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Black Hole

What happen to me?
These questions started to repeat in my mind.
Not different but the same old question.
Sooner or later I be sick and tired by this question.
There is this dark emptiness in me.
Loneliness? Sadness? Negative ness?
I don’t know but the feeling is just horrible.
There is something that I need that every single human
in this planet need. If you don’t have it you will go insane
or maybe just a horrible torture of life.
The emptiness is expend every single each day.
When I feel sad, my tears just don’t come out.
Loneliness, I am like cold blooded animal. Where I don’t
recognize feeling anymore.
Toxic and poison thought began to spread in my brain.
Where I got negative psychology thinking began.
I just don’t know what the plan is anymore.
I am that boy who is goal oriented but not anymore.
As if going through the blank space or walking in the dark.

I am now relying on God. Is that good? I believe god have plan
for us and that word call fate.
If, example God do plan for us,
Than why should I plan where god have make a plan for
us even the day before we born.

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