Behind The Scene of India Gang Rape - I Want The World To Know...


India gang rape victim's father:
I want the world to know my daughter's name is Jyoti Singh Pandey.

Devastated dad tells The Sunday People he hopes revealing her name will give courage to other women who have survived such attacks

She is known to the world only as India’s Daughter following her sickening gang rape and murder.

But today, with permission of her devastated father, we can reveal her name: Jyoti Singh Pandey.

Brave dad Badri, 53, told The Sunday People: “We want the world to know her real name.

“My daughter didn’t do anything wrong, she died while protecting herself.

“I am proud of her. Revealing her name will give courage to other women who have survived these attacks. They will find strength from my daughter.”

We interviewed Badri and his family in his ancestral village of Billia in the northern Indian state of Uttar Pradesh.

They have retreated there to grieve away from their Delhi home – a place that will constantly remind them of the barbaric sexual attack Jyoti, 23, was subjected to when she and a male friend were lured on to a bus.

His wife Asha, 46, was too shell-shocked to talk to us.

Badri said: “At first I wanted to see the men responsible face to face but I don’t want to any more. I just want to hear that the courts have punished them and they will be hanged.

“Death for all six of them. These men are beasts. They should be made an example of and that society will not allow such things to happen.”

Recalling the day he found out about his only daughter’s ordeal, Badri said he had just returned home after 10:30pm on December 16 from his shift at Delhi airport where he works as a loader.

His wife was worried after Jyoti, a medical school graduate, had not returned home from the cinema.

Badri said: “We started calling her mobile and her friend’s mobile but there was no answer.

“Then at 11.15pm we got a call from the hospital in Delhi telling me my daughter had been in an accident.”

Badri asked a friend to take him on a motorbike.

He said: “When I first saw her she was in the bed with her eyes closed.

“I put my hand on her forehead and called her name. She slowly opened her eyes and started crying and said she was in pain.

“I held my tears. I told her not to worry, have strength and everything will be all right.”

At the time Badri still didn’t know what had happened. A policeman finally explained. Jyoti and her friend Awindra Pandey, 28, had boarded a bus to get home but had been taken on a two-and-a-half hour ride to hell by the driver, his assistant and four passengers.

Both were battered with iron bars and Jyoti was repeatedly raped before they were stripped and dumped on a road leading to Delhi airport – yards from where Badri was working.

He said: “I immediately called my wife and sons and told them to come to the hospital. But I couldn’t tell them about the rape.”

For the first ten days Jyoti was in and out of consciousness and it was hopeful she would survive. Badri said: “Doctors did their best to save her. She spoke a few times but mostly through gestures. She had a feeding pipe in her mouth making it difficult for her to speak.

But she did write on some paper that she wanted to live, she wanted to survive and stay with us. But it was fate that had the last say in the end.”

Jyoti gave the police two statements, but Badri was too distraught to sit in as he couldn’t listen to what his daughter had been subjected to.

“My wife was with her through the statements but she cried so much after hearing it all,” Badri said.

“She then told me what happened. I don’t have the words to describe the incident. All I can say is they’re not human, not even animals. They’re not of this world.

“It was just gruesome and I hope no one ever goes through what she had to endure.

“She cried a lot, she was in a lot of pain. And as soon as she saw her mother and brothers she cried again.

“But after that she was a courageous girl, even trying to console us and give us hope that everything will be all right.”

Doctors were forced to remove Jyoti’s intestines and as her conditioned worsened, they flew her to Singapore for specialist care on Boxing Day.

Badri said: “I told her everything would be OK and we’ll soon be back home. She was excited when we talked about going home and she smiled.

“I put my hand on her forehead, she asked me if I’d had any dinner and then she gestured for me to go to sleep. I held her hand and kissed it. I told her to take rest and not to worry and she closed her eyes.”

As Jyoti battled for life, thousands took to the streets to demand the hanging of the six accused and a new anti-rape law. But three days later on December 29 she had a fatal heart attack.

Badri said: “I so desperately wanted her to survive, even though she would have to live with a memory of that attack and get through her trauma.

“We’re so devastated that she’s gone. There’s a huge void in our lives. She was the centre of our universe. Our lives revolved around her.

“Her absence is so painful, a future without her is unimaginable.”

Badri said Jyoti’s friend Awindra was not her boyfriend – just a very brave friend who tried to save her.

He said: “There was no question of her marrying because we belong to different castes.

“She never expressed a desire to marry. She was concentrating on her studies and wanted a job first.”

Badri also revealed that Jyoti often mentioned how much Awindra tried to save her.

“She kept telling her mother he tried his best to help but they kept beating him with a rod.”

Badri now cherishes the memories of his daughter. He remembers her dream of being a doctor.

He said: “I told her I can’t afford to pay for her to do such subjects but she was determined. She wanted to be a doctor and earn lots of money and go overseas a lot.”

When Badri first moved to Delhi in 1983 he earned just 150 Rupees a month – the equivalent of £1.70 today.

But he sold some land to pay for his daughter’s studies and saved as much as possible from his 5,700 Rupees (£65) a month he now earns.

Badri said: “It’s hard living in Delhi on my wages, very hard. But Jyoti always said she would change all of that. She wanted to change our lives once she got a job.”

Jyoti had only just finished her four-year course in physiotherapy at college outside Delhi. She was doing an internship when she was attacked.

Her brothers, Gaurav Singh, 20, and Saurav Singh, 15, were close to their big sister and cannot image how they will cope.

Gaurav said: “Life is going to be so difficult without her. Without her guidance I don’t know what to do or how to go about life again.”

Badri and all the family have been touched by the way the nation has supported them.

He said: “The people of India have given us strength to cope up with our loss. I feel she’s not just my daughter but also India’s daughter.

“I used to read about rape incidents in the newspapers but never digested it much. We’re so thankful to the people who came out to protest against the barbarity.”

DNA tests have linked five men and a 17-year-old from the bus with rape and murder. The men will appear at the District Court in the Saket area of the Indian capital tomorrow. The 17-year-old will be tried separately as a juvenile.

Badri now hopes mothers and fathers will teach their sons to respect women.

He said: “The police cannot handle this on their own. But parents need to keep an eye on their children too.”

Badri’s face lit up when he spoke of Jyoti’s dreams and invited us to look through his family album. Each photo showed his beautiful daughter smiling. In most she is wears western clothes, which she favoured over the traditional sari. She also always wore her long, dark shiny hair down and flowing – never tied up.

In respect with Badri’s wishes he has asked us not to picture her.

Releasing a photo of her is for another day.

Indian law prohibits naming a rape victim unless she authorises it or, if she is dead, her family agrees to it.

At the moment it is enough for the devastated family to sanction the release to the world of their precious daughter’s name.

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1st Week of March Reflection - The Last Day Of Internship

After my birthday  on 2012 of early October, the next follow week is where the journey in my job attachment begin. It was a tough challenge and it was a roller coaster ride. But the value of knowledge and friendship bring the experience that is priceless and unique. But nevertheless I will treasure those time but the price I got to pay is to remember those bad experience too.





Well that is my team in CNC Department. It was a cooling environment,
I dont mind the coolant smell,
You control the sophisticated machine,
You do the judgement on the quality of the job piece which the machine perform,
Lastly, it was slacking as result could joke around with these people.

Reflection:

When you lead a team, and there are time that one or two will try to bring you down.
I dont know is that a human nature or the temptation/ jealousy.
Well you are the only transmitter and there so many receiver,
But all I know that it is NOT YOUR responsible on how each individual interpreted. 

Gossips is so juicy that it is everyone favorite.
But to resolve things fast in the situation of infliction or mis-communication,
Confront or tell the person off. Not many people have the balls to do that.
But actually the actual protocol indicate that you need to confront. 
Based on the communication skill module I taught in RP.



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Choose A Successor


There was once an Emperor from China who had no children and needed to choose a successor.

Thousands of children from across the kingdom came to the palace and were surprised when the Emperor exclaimed that he was going to choose one of them. He gave them all a seed. They were to go home to their villages, plant the seed in a pot and tend it for a year. When they return in a year, the Emperor would judge their efforts and choose his successor.

One boy named Ling was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly told his mother the story. She helped him get a pot and planting soil, and he planted the seed and watered it carefully.

Everyday he would water it and watch to see if it had grown. After about three weeks, some of the other youths began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow. Ling kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew.

Three weeks, 4 weeks, 5 weeks went by. Still nothing. By now, others were talking about their plants but Ling didn't have a plant, and he felt like a failure. Six months went by; still nothing in Ling's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing.

Ling didn't say anything to his friends, however. He just kept waiting for his seed grow. A year finally went by and all of the youths of the kingdom brought their plants to the emperor for inspection.


Ling told his mother that he wasn't going to take an empty pot but his mother said he must be honest about what happened.

Ling felt sick to his stomach, but he knew his mother was right. He took his empty pot to the palace.

When Ling arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by the other youths.

They were beautiful -- in all shape and sizes. Ling put his empty pot on the floor and many of the other kids laughed at him. A few felt sorry for him and just said, "Hey nice try."

When the emperor arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted the young people. Ling just tried to hide in the back. "My, what great plants, trees and flowers you have grown," said the emperor. "Today, one of you will be appointed the next emperor!"

All of the sudden, the emperor spotted Ling at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered his guards to bring him to the front. Ling was terrified.

"The emperor knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me killed!"

When Ling got to the front, the emperor asked his name. "My name is Ling," he replied. All kids were laughing and making fun of him. The emperor asked everyone to quiet down.

He looked at Ling, and then announced to the crowd, "Behold your new emperor! His name is Ling!" Ling couldn't believe it. Ling couldn't even grow his seed. How could he be the new emperor?


Then the emperor said, "One year ago today, I gave everyone here a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today.

But I gave you all boiled seeds, which would not grow. All of you, except Ling, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you.

Ling was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the new emperor!"

So be careful what you plant now, it will determine what you will reap tomorrow.
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I Wish You Enough


Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter’s departure had been announced. Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said: “I love you and I wish you enough.”

The daughter replied, “Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom.” They kissed and the daughter left.

The mother walked over to the window where I sat. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, “Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?” “Yes, I have,” I replied. “Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?”

“I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral,” she said. When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, “I wish you enough.” May I ask what that means?”

She began to smile. “That’s a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone.” She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more.

“When we said ‘I wish you enough’ we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them”. Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory,

“I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.”
She then began to cry and walked away.

Nurture Relationships…..As they say….It takes a minute to find a special person ~ An hour to appreciate them ~ A day to love them ~ And then an entire life to forget them.




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One Week Down Four More Weeks To Go

It was before the eve of Chinese New Year and after this week I have four more week before I finish my intern.

Have a mix feeling of wanting to finish the intern but I might miss my colleague and the job that recently I find it interesting. That is the CNC machine.

It was not all about putting the metal piece in the machine and press the start button. It was about visual inspection and your own judgement to decide that the work piece is in acceptable quality or not. Remember each piece worth like $110 and reject it must have a valid reason.

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